16 hours ago
11
Move over, Wagatha Christie: Furlock Holmes is investigating “non-human behaviour” in Texas schools. A Republican state representative called Stan Gerdes recently filed a bill called the Forbidden Unlawful Representation of Roleplaying in Educational Spaces (FURRIES) Act, which would ban schoolkids from acting like animals. No hissing during history, no meowing during maths, and absolutely no relieving yourself in a litter box during lunch break, according to the FURRIES Act.
Are animal impersonations a serious issue in Texas’s schools? Gerdes insists so, noting in a press release that he had heard reports of a “furry-related incident” in at least one school. When pressed on the issue, however, he was unable to provide any actual evidence of schools providing litter boxes for students who identify as felines.
This, of course, is because there aren’t any examples. Nevertheless, the myth that schools are hotbeds of cat-litter-based activity has been circulating for years, amplified by numerous Republicans and conservative influencers. I should note that, having investigated the matter back in 2022, NBC News was able to find one example of a school that had cat litter in its classrooms. But you know why that was? It was part of an emergency supply kit in case kids were locked in a classroom for an extended amount of time during a school shooting. There were 56 school shootings in the US last year, by the way. Furries weren’t responsible for any of them.
I am sure there are people out there so indoctrinated by Fox News and internet brain-rot that they sincerely believe teachers are trying to turn innocent schoolchildren into cats. But I highly doubt Gerdes is one of them. Rather, this all seems to be a cynical attempt to attack public (state) schools and justify defunding them. Tellingly, Texas governor Greg Abbott referenced the FURRIES Act during a recent speech in which he was trying to promote a bill (which has now passed) that would allow for taxpayer money to be used to help certain students pay for private school tuition.
Distracting your gullible voters with culture war nonsense so you can pass legislation that will make the rich richer and hurt the most vulnerable? It’s a Republican tail as old as time.
